2013 Elections: Show Me Your Dirty Finger
And here’s my I-suck-so-much-you’re-going-to-slap-me-stupid post of the week. It basically revolves around the fact that I didn’t get to vote for the 2013 elections.
Boo! Yeah, I know. “What’s your stupid excuse?” you might ask. I’ll get to that in a minute – but before that, let me share with you a few things I learned about this year’s elections. Tell me if you agree or if you have violent objections to make – it’s all good. After all, we live in a democratic country (for now).
2013 Elections: Lessons Learned
I spent the entire day watching television and observing online, getting green with envy as I saw everyone post about how hot it was outside, how long the queue was – oh, and how the PCOS machine always conked out at the right moment. In other words, I have assimilated so much information about what lessons are to be learned from the 2013 elections that I was compelled to share them with you.
- We have overpaid for the PCOS machine. Duh. It always has a glitch, whether it’s in the form of a reflux disease (many machines seemed to be regurgitating the ballots) or machine laziness (they turn on only when they feel like it). Seriously, I can’t believe we actually purchased these things. My ten-year-old Nokia phone has a better track record by comparison!
- Dirty finger selfies are so in. I can’t count on my (dirty) fingers how many people took selfie pics of their fingers after their much-coveted indelible ink mark. I swear, Twitter and Instagram are up to their necks in dirty finger selfies. And yeah, it’s kinda cool.
- It sort of sucks to be a teacher during the elections. The media coverage of the 2013 elections just goes to show how much teachers are overworked and underappreciated when it’s time to cast our votes. We aren’t giving them the slack they need. If you think you can do a better job, go ahead, volunteer to be their replacement.
- “No vote” means “no right to complain about stupid politicians”. There are way too many registered voters who didn’t exercise their responsibility to vote. Even worse, there are way too many people who are qualified to vote but didn’t even bother to register! And if you didn’t get to vote but should have, then you just about threw away your right to elect better government officials. So yeah, you practically lost your chance to complain about the Sottos of this country.
- We still suck at elections. I saw the official lists of registered voters hanging from wire fences like they were tissue paper. I saw senior citizens lining up to cast their vote. I saw express lanes for differently-abled citizens that require them to go up three floors. There’s a lot of that going around, people.
I hope that, unlike me, you got to vote for the people who deserve to represent you. As for my piss-poor excuse for failing to vote, I’ve been too sick to leave my room for about two days now. I even missed my boyfriend’s birthday bash – and God knows how that’s “missing half of my life”, or so my friends told me.
I didn’t get to vote. That’s what I get for staying up late three days ago while I was drenched in sweat the whole day, supporting a friend running for councilor, and eating questionable grilled squid in the process.
That’s what I get for being drenched in sweat the entire day about three days ago, staying up late, supporting a friend running for councilor, and eating questionable grilled squid in the process. (Which reminds me, if you’re in Marikina, do vote for Tado!)
So pardon me as I end this blog post prematurely and go back to the toilet to throw up a little more, hoping this is the last time I do (although I know deep in my heart of hearts that it isn’t). Let’s pray for a better Philippines after the 2013 elections. Oh, and while you’re at it, you might as well pray for a better Stef because seriously, I can’t wait to be well enough to take a bath. (Ew.)