Haters are every person’s bane. Haters stalk you online, post anonymous comments on your Facebook page or blog that are rude or sarcastic, and become a source of annoyance. But having haters is not always a bad thing. In fact, it may be good to have haters once in a while.

Always remember that hatred is not the opposite of love and admiration; indifference is. So, if someone hates you, it means they feel strongly for you and their hatred may just be a form of defense mechanism called reaction formation.

Haters: An Example of “Reaction Formation”

In reaction formation, when a person knows he admires or envies you but he can’t handle that fact, he develops the exact opposite reaction of what he really feels. The typical example of reaction formation is a spiritual person who happens to be a pedophile: although he loves children (in a sick sense), he knows it’s wrong, so he forms a reaction and overtly starts hating pedophilia instead. He may even go to the extent of joining rallies against known pedophiles or lobbying for a heavier punishment for pedophiles… despite the fact that he is one.

So, if you have haters, they are most probably people who have one defense mechanism in common: reaction formation. They secretly envy and admire you but they can’t live with it.

Haters: Why It’s Good To Have Them

We should avoid fights and arguments, acting as peacemakers whenever possible; however, we can never avoid having haters if we are in the public eye. As explained above, haters are a mutated form of fans – and they will always be part of the package.

Do not fret; having haters can actually be a good thing! Here are a few reasons why it’s good to have haters once in a while.

• Haters are mirrors that show the mistakes you might have overlooked. Having a busy life, even when it is dedicated to noble causes, may distract you from noticing some of your mistakes. Haters are one of the first people to point these mistakes out, serving as a sort of moral checkpoint. And yes, we all need those checkpoints.
• Haters are fans, in a twisted way. A normal person who hates a public figure will not go out of his way nor spend extra time just to stalk or annoy his object of hatred. An admirer-turned-hater, on the other hand, will do exactly that. Haters usually obsess about the person they hate. Their worlds may revolve around the person they so hate – and really, isn’t that a little flattering? Read on for more.

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Some people have grand ambitions. They want to become millionaires before age thirty. Or they want to have a brand-spanking-new car to parade around town. And then there are the people with cancer who want nothing more than to have their lives back.

Life is the gift of all gifts: with life, everything is possible. But cancer threatens to snatch all those possibilities away, stealing the one thing that makes everything else seem petty and trivial. With millions of people suffering from cancer, something has to be done. It has to be done quickly. It has to be done now.

This is why the American Cancer Society is doing its best to propagate news on cancer, sharing information with cancer patients and their loved ones. In turn, they share hope.

“Cancer? Nope, that’s not happening to me.”

When you don’t have cancer, you believe in your heart of hearts that you will never have it. It’s something that happens to other people, but not to you. This is probably what you think, yes? And believe me, this is what majority of cancer patients felt before they received word from their doctor that yes, they did have cancer.

“Cancer? I don’t have it, so it’s not my battle.”

Let’s not deny the fact that our lifestyle choices already predispose us to cancer. How many servings of fruits and veggies do you eat a day? Do you even eat fruits or veggies every day to begin with? Do you handle stress well? Do you get screened for cancers common in your age group? Answering no to any of these questions is a red flag for cancer – and yes, it makes you a candidate.

Already, many people fight the battle against the big C. Every day of their lives, they live with a condition that bullies them into submission. They fight this battle because they have cancer. The least we can do is fight it with them.

Let’s aim for less cancer and more birthdays. We have our health; let us use it wisely. We have a voice; let us tell our friends to eat healthy, get screened, and live a healthy lifestyle. Spread awareness; share the video below with your loved ones and share a message of hope with them.

If you or your loved one has cancer, join the worldwide battle against the big C. It is a noble cause. And you have nothing to lose.  

This post is sponsored by the American Cancer Society. I fully support their cause. And you can, too, by watching this video and sharing it with the people you hold dear. Spread hope. Share the video. Help fight the war against cancer because, whether you like it or not, you and I are soldiers in this battle. You can also find me on Facebook – please like my page; I write about cancer and I want everyone to listen.

Today is a special day: it’s Mother’s Day 2012! They say 2012 is the year when the world will meet its end – that’s rather morbid, but perhaps Mother’s Day will help tone down that scary thought. (And to those who don’t know when Mother’s Day 2012 is, it’s on May 13, 2012.)

This blog post is a tribute to my mother, arguably the best mother in the world. She sold kangkong leaves after grade school, saving money every year, and sending herself to high school one year at a time. Imagine having to stop every year just to save up for the next school year! She then became a midwife, then a nurse, then a teacher, then a dean, and finally, an assistant director in a prestigious college. She has gone a long way – and I can never imagine living her life the way she did.

Mother’s Day: 2012 versus 2011

Last year, what did you to during Mother’s Day? Mother’s Day 2012 for me is much quieter, compared to last year. I actually had to host a Mother’s Day event in a mall last year; talk about stage fright!

But this 2012, I’m devoting Mother’s Day to blogging about my mother. Her attributes as a mother are worth emulating. I remember her checking up on me every hour whenever I had a fever, acting like she was on duty in the hospital. She would support my endeavors, making me feel like the best daughter in the world for all my humble achievements, while making reassuring me that my failures were just stepping stones to more success.

I have never felt unloved by my mother. Having a mother like her makes me feel like the luckiest person in the world. Happy Mother’s Day, Mama, and I hope to see you again soon!

Don’t forget to greet your mother today! She has helped mold you into who you are now. She will always love you, no matter what. For Mother’s Day 2012, make your mom feel special because, yes, she is. And speaking of motherhood, check out my newest “child”, my two-month-old blog, Stef dela Cruz! You can also find me on Twitter or Facebook – get in touch!

I’ve been looking for hardwood desks in the Philippines and I’ve had the most difficult time finding a good store. For starters, furniture stores in the Philippines, especially those found in malls, usually offer laminated wood furniture. But here are a few things I learned about buying hardwood desks that may make the search easier for you.

This is the hardwood desk I bought in Manila. It’s made of mahogany. I love its details and the fixtures on it! But finding it was a pain in the neck, I have to admit.

Hardwood Desks in the Philippines

Finally, my hardwood desk and bedframe arrived today! I ordered them over a month ago and they were so worth the wait. But given the rather slim pickings of hardwood furniture in the Philippines, I want to share the few things I have learned during the two years that I searched for great hardwood desks and furniture.

• Make sure to measure the space in your home before you buy hardwood desks. Will the desk fit perfectly in that corner of your room where you want it to be? You won’t know unless you get measurements. Continue reading and find out how much you might be spending on one hardwood desk.

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