Relationship Articles Are My Horror Movies

Friday, February 11, 2011 Stef dela Cruz 0 Comments

Have you ever tried sitting through a horror movie that scares the hell out of you? When the movie ends, you feel like throwing up and murdering the person who forced you to watch it – but you have to admit, you also feel empowered to have lived through it. It’s just like staring into the barrel of a gun: totally freaky, but when you live to tell about it, you’re an instant hero, even if it’s only according to you.

There’s something so absurdly freaky about everyone’s mushiness, what with Valentines scareddrawing near – and all of it is really getting to me. To make myself clear: all the relationship talk is scaring me out of my own skin. And what better thing to do on a Thursday night than to max out on relationship articles on the internet?

It was like watching a horror movie. Freaked me out, freaked me out, freaked me out. But I’m still alive and breathing – well, panting like a scared little sissy is more like it. I did read a few things that made me react violently. So, kudos to the Internet for keeping me entertained, although I was semi-insane half the time. Anyway, here goes the hodgepodge of the things I “learned” about relationships:

  • About two out of every three married people still think about their ex girlfriend or boyfriend way too much. What?! That’s just sick. Please, I’d rather be single than end up with someone who’s still thinking of the girl he was with before me. Spare me the gross factor.
  • Some people believe that exclusivity and commitment are one and the same. These people need a dictionary. Perhaps exclusivity demands a certain commitment, but they’re not entirely the same. They belong to one spectrum, but they’re not the same banana. Why on earth would people think they are? Don’t even get me started.
  • Men believe in love more than women. Well, that’s true… if s3x and love are one and the same! My mind refuses to believe it. When did men become more romantic than women? And who started spreading these rumors?!
  • There are a lot of crappy relationship articles out there that people will read rather than actual evidence-based write-ups. Yeah, I read quite a lot today. And I’ve bitten off more than I can chew. I actually had to stop myself from laughing hysterically once or twice, and during the times that I couldn’t help it, my eyes were wide in shock… and I was also very grossed out.

FYI: I’m still freaking out, by the way.

Well, that was two hours of my life I shall never get back. Yes, I’ve met my quota of “horror movies” a.k.a. relationship articles for one day – nay, for one lifetime. Thank you, Jesus save me, I’m moving on.

Stef dela CruzAbout the blogger
Stef dela Cruz is a doctor and writer. She received the 2013 Award for Health Media from the Department of Health. She maintains a health column in Health.Care Magazine and contributes to The Manila Bulletin. Add her to your circles.