Even Serial Killers Have Girlfriends

Thursday, December 09, 2010 Stef dela Cruz 0 Comments

I was reading an article about a serial killer and his many ways of choosing a victim. He would pretend to need help, sometimes asking for directions. His girlfriend never even had a clue that he was a serial killer. He had several ways of torturing his victims. He would –


Wait a second. Here’s a serial killer, and he’s in a relationship?!


Okay, that’s downright depressing. Don’t get me wrong; I know that being single is like a breath of fresh air after having been in a serious relationship myself. No more “having” to do stuff: I don’t have to give out the compulsory small-talk text, I don’t have to put my phone on loud to answer most (if not all) calls and avoid arguments, I don’t have to feel scared whenever I go out with my other guy friends. And now, I can go “guy windowshopping” without feeling like a thief who deserves to go to jail forever.


However, we’re talking about a psychopath, a man who kills people for a hobby… and he gets to be in a serious relationship? Eh. Bite me.


Getting into a serious relationship is like drinking poison. Your single self will die a slow, torturous death. You may – nay, will – make a lot of sacrifices and compromises. That said, I would like to clarify that I’m not commitment-phobic… or am I? (But I digress – and that’s a different blog post altogether.)


serial killerIn the middle of the serial killer article I was reading, I started to wonder about the lot of us singles who can’t find a “significant other” if our lives depended on it. If someone pointed a gun at me and said, “FIND A BOYFRIEND IN A MONTH OR I’LL SHOOT YOU IN THE HEAD!!!” I think I’ll walk to the nearest funeral home and reserve a coffin without delay – that’s because I know for sure I’ve got just one more month to live.


In any case, if a serial killer can get into a relationship, what does that make of me? Great. I’m a few rungs lower from a serial killer in the hierarchy of social statuses. What a great day to be single.

Stef dela CruzAbout the blogger
Stef dela Cruz is a doctor and writer. She received the 2013 Award for Health Media from the Department of Health. She maintains a health column in Health.Care Magazine and contributes to The Manila Bulletin. Add her to your circles.